You met them on your first day of university, you went along with them for the Fresher’s events and been around with them at home. But something just doesn’t click right with the two of you. You don’t get along with your flatmate.
At some point in most of our lives, we all end up living with people that we don’t like. It’s normal for us not to get along with every single person we meet, but we do need to learn to live together.
Not sure how to tolerate a housemate you don’t get along with? Here are a few tips to help you live together peacefully.
Try to Get to Know Them
When you meet someone you don’t get along with, the last thing you want to do is spend more time hanging out with them. But trying to get to know them a little better is a great way to thaw the icy feeling between the two of you.
You’ll learn to understand each other more and it could help the two of you grow a little closer. You might realise that you have more in common than you initially thought and it could make the world of difference.
Try to set some time aside to have dinner together or hang out on the sofa and just chat. Even if you don’t end up becoming friends with them, then you know that you at least made the effort.
Communicate Properly
As with all relationships, the key is always good communication. This is no different when it comes to dealing with housemates you don’t get along with.
Set some limits and let your housemate know when something they do bothers you. This can be anything from leaving dirty dishes out to waking everyone up at 3 am when they come home from a night out.
Don’t be confrontational, just calmly talk to them about how this is unacceptable and how they should be more considerate next time. Honesty is the best policy, and you should expect them to pull you up on any issues they may have with you. This will help the two of you live together in a much more harmonious way.
Make a Cleaning Rota
One of the biggest issues that creates conflict between housemates is keeping the place clean. It always seems like someone in the flat isn’t pulling their weight and they seem to always leave a mess wherever they go.
An easy way to fix this is to draw up a cleaning rota for each week. Allocate tasks to each housemate fairly and ensure that everyone is responsible for their own mess. This will help to keep any conflicts at bay and even if you don’t get along with them, at least you won’t have to deal with their messes.
Agree to Disagree
If you find yourself butting heads and getting into arguments on a regular basis, it’s important to learn to let things go. Otherwise, you’ll end up spending a lot of time getting angry and upset when you could focus on other things.
Learn to agree to disagree with each other instead of getting into arguments. It’ll save you both a lot of time and energy and you’ll both be able to focus on more important things. Have respect for their opinions and walk away.
If you continue to argue with each other, one or both of you will end up saying something that you regret. This can make the whole situation worse and could ruin things for your other flatmates too.
Take Action if Necessary
If you find that your flatmate is being aggressive, harassing or abusive, it’s time to take action. It’s one thing to have a flatmate that you don’t get along with, but one that leaves you feeling bullied or in danger is another.
Get in touch with your building manager or your university and let them know about the problem. They will be able to help your situation and could relocate you or the offender to another building (or kick them out if necessary).
These Are A Few Tips to Help You Tolerate a Housemate
If you’ve found yourself living with a person – or people – you don’t get along with, it can be daunting. Coming home can feel very unwelcoming, but these are a few ways to make life a little easier.
At the end of the day, you can move out next year and you’ll never have to see them again!
For a fun read on how not to get along with your flatmates, check out our blog post.
